Ugh Voicebox

Was practicing the guitar and I'm so glad I'm almost done with state of grace and pumped up kicks. State of grace only consists of 2 chords lol until the bridge then Em comes in but thats easy too. The thing is I took videos of myself singing along and I don't like my voice.. It's so.. unappealing. It's like in tune the notes are there but the tone is just ugh. Maybe its cos I can't sing as well sitting down idk. I've never had that pop song kinda voice. I tried using my lower register like pushing the larynx down to get that black women ailee kinda voice its supposed to help so that you can reach high notes easier but then my voice becomes so yawny at the top range sometimes I can't even hit it with chest voice :(
I think I'm more cut out for choral singing than pop song singing.. I wish shiyu was still in choir then maybe she can teach me a thing or 2 bout proper singing. I'm sure with proper training everyone can sing. Prolly not as well as legends but still decent singing. Unless you're tone deaf.. then that's sad lol. And I feel paiseh for blasting at home then my fam can hear my horrible attempts at singing like a soulful black woman x__o
NEED A SOUND PROOF ROOM.
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